Confidence

I have been on another blogging hiatus lately.  For one I have been busy and tired so for this very sad reason I haven't been as good about getting in my quiet times.  Lame excuse I know and terrible of me to put my quiet times off instead of the other busyness.  I know which is better for me.  Why do I choose the wrong one? 

The other reason is that I haven't felt overly inspired to write too much.  I seem to be falling a little flat with connecting with John.  Don't get me wrong.  This is God's Word and it is always filled with good stuff that I need to know, I just haven't felt much 'connection' to what John has specifically been saying at this current time.  I know God will use it at some point though, so it is good to know where it is.

Today I read about confidence.  Confidence is something I am not too great at.  I have always been a people pleaser so I don't want to step on toes or disappoint anyone, so I have always been a bit hesitant to do things out of the 'norm'.  Now, this statement might surprise some who know me now because I am usually one who isn't afraid to get up in front of a group or take charge of this or that.  This could be construed as confidence, but I assure you that I have just gotten used to making a fool out of myself over the years and it just doesn't bother me as much anymore.  I still finish and think about how silly I looked or what I said or did wrong and then fret and fret over this and that. 

But, of course, John wasn't really talking about this kind of confidence, but rather the confidence we need to have when Jesus returns.  We need to be able to have confidence and be unashamed when we stand before Him on that day.  I am so thankful for this confidence.  I is one that I never have to question myself about or fret over.  I know that the day I stand before Him, He will look at me and know that I love Him.  He will know who I am because I try my best (sometimes better than others, of course) to spend time with Him and get to know Him better.

Now, this isn't to say I never screw up and have to run back to Him begging forgiveness.  But I know that as long as I repent and try my best to do better next time, I am washed clean of that sin and no longer have to be ashamed of it.  He will not bring it back up on the day that I meet Him because as soon as I ask and He forgives, He forgets what it ever was.  I can have the confidence of complete forgiveness and love from Him on the day I get to see Him face to face.

This is a confidence worth striving for.  It is eternal.