From the Heart

Yikes!  Its been a while.  Things have been a bit crazy and I have been a bit lazy.  Come look at my house, it isn't only my blog and Bible that have felt neglected the last couple of weeks.  It is a bit scary around here. 

But neglect no more.  I have high hopes for a much more laid back summer from here until the 26th of July, then it gets a little bit hairy again.  I have confessed my failures and asked for some major help in getting back on track.  It seems to happen to me every couple of months, these little 'gaps' in responsibility.  I let my calendar get too full and everything else, including my time with God, ends up in the gutters. 

Well, I'm back in the game again, so here we go!

I have been trying to plug through 1 Peter.  Obviously, it has been a slow process.  Don't get me wrong, there is a lot of good stuff in here, but when you only read a couple of verses a week, it is hard to really dig in.

Chapter 1 verse 22 says "Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart."

I think God is trying to tell me something.  Yesterday our sermon at church was on the story of the Good Samaritan, which we all know is about loving our neighbor.  Now I read to love one another deeply, from the heart.  Evidently, I have some learning to do on loving.

Funny thing is, the pastor asked us to think of someone that we have a hard time loving and to purpose to show them love this week.  Someone we kind of try to avoid if possible, etc., and, honestly, I came up blank.  Don't get me wrong, I am no saint.  I don't get along just peachy with everyone, but sitting there I really couldn't think of someone I needed to work harder on loving. 

Clearly, I have some praying to do.  Is it so bad that I don't even realize when I have issues with someone?  Am I so numb to the friction that I don't even recognize it anymore?  Is that possible?  Because, seriously, I do not get along swimmingly with everyone.  I know this.

Or is it the fact that I am totally a people pleaser.  Is this why I don't recognize it?  Do I work so hard to please everyone that I don't even realize we don't get along that great. 

Oh, I just don't know.  And then, the paranoid-people-pleaser in me makes me wonder how many people thought of my name when that question was asked?  Am I that person for anyone?  Maybe my overly loud, bubbly, wants-to-make-you-like-me personality drives some people nuts and I am totally that person they try to avoid? 

Now I think I am over thinking this.  Love.  Its all about L.O.V.E. Love.  I need to not worry about what other people think or do or say or how they make me feel.  The bottom line is that God commands us to love and to love deeply and this is what I need to do.  I need to put my excessively sensitive feelings aside and think of others first.  I need to reach out and do kind things.  I need to demonstrate God's love to everyone around me every second of the day. 

And God knows I can't do that on my own.  It is something I have to depend on Him for.  It is something I have to learn by spending time with Him.

Well, I guess I have a mission for this week.  If I am overly nice to you, don't read into it too deeply.  Remember, I couldn't think of anyone specific that I try to avoid, so I am going to just love everyone! :)