Taking Off the Mask

Its hard to be 'real' nowadays.  Always wanting to put up a good front, to be liked, to fit in with the rest of the group. Am I the only one this way?  Oh, I stick in just enough of the real me so as to not come across fake, but hold back enough so as to not come across as weird or loud or any of that other stuff people might not like.

This might get me well liked in a group, but what I am finding (as I read in the 'friends' section of my Make Over book today) is that only giving people the surface of me, gets me only surface friendships.  And when you only have surface friendships, you miss out on a lot.

Jen H. in her brilliance likens this to Jesus' relationship with Mary vs. His relationship with Martha.  While Mary took her time to get to know Jesus and spend time with Him, Martha spent her time hosting Him and doing the work.  So, when it got down to the nitty gritty (the death of their brother) and Jesus explaining things to them, you can really see the difference in the depths of His conversation with each woman based on the friendship He had with each of them. 

What a lesson!  #1:  I need to take more time for my friends.  In one of her questions at the bottom of a page she asked why we thought it was so hard to cultivate real, deep relationships.  My immediate response was, "We don't have enough time."  On the next page she asks, "What would you say to a woman who sees only incredibly busy women around her who couldn't possibly have time to be her friend?"  Ouch.  I'd say its time to stop making excuses and start making room.  Real friendships pay off way beyond their worth of time invested. 

I am one of those women with a TON of surface friends.  I can hang out with the best of them and a lot of them.  I am, sadly, one who doesn't have a lot of deep friendships.  I have 2 friends who have stuck by me since the age of 14.  They are amazing.  Their only downfall is that they live 100 and 4,000 miles away.  I am so grateful for phone calls!  I have two other friends close by that I would consider great friends as well, but so many others that I would love to be deeper friendships that I just haven't taken the time for.

Lesson #2:  Cultivate a friendship with Jesus, so that when it comes time to talk to Him, I can have a Mary conversation instead of a Martha one.  These conversations can take place everyday through my prayer time. 

Once again, there is that time factor.  So, in hindsight.  Take off the mask, be yourself and take the time to become real and deep.  It is only these types of friendships that really pay off in the end.