Sacrificial Thanks

(Psalm 50:14-15, 23)

Today's is a hard one for me.  Not because I have such a hard time thanking God for hard things in my life, but because, thankfully, I don't have that many hard things in my life right now. 

Don't get me wrong,  I have been through my fair share of hard things in life.  Growing up without a mom (although I did have wonderful mother figures very active in my life), having my dad serve over seas, a year of trying to get pregnant before it acutally worked, a miscarriage, and many other small issues along the way have been my plights in life. 

On this list of things, I don't see much in which I haven't been able to see God's grand scheme in it all after time.  Oh yes, going through them, was hard but in the end God has used them for wonderful things.  Had my mom survived that car accident, I would have grown up travelling the country with my dad as a pilot in the USAF.  It would have been fabulous, but would I have been loyal to the wonderful state of Nebraska had I not grown up here?  Would I have attended the University and met my amazing husband?  Questions that will remain unanswered because God's planned prevailed.  I grew up without a mother and ended up meeting the love of my life.  The only thing I still struggle with in this situation is my dad.  He has never remarried and since he is a mand of very few words (this is an extreme understatement if you know my father) I don't really know how he is in his thankfulness for my mom's death.  Wow, it is really hard to say you are thankful that your mom died when you were young.  It just feels wrong.  But, I know where she is and that I will see her again.

As for the rest it is easy to see the thankfulness in the end.  Having my dad over seas meant we corresponded mostly through email.  Evidently I get my ability to 'think' better through a computer from him, because during his time away was some of the most informative and touching communication I have ever received from him.  I saved all of those emails and still have them (that was 9 years ago). 

A year of 'trying' resulted in my precious son and a great lesson in prayer and patience and trust in God's plan.  The miscarriage resulted again in trusting God and my one experience of truly and literally 'seeing' His power.  On the way home from the ER the night we were given the news our baby would not survive, God displayed in power of it all to me by showing me the most magnificent lightening I have ever seen.  I could see and feel God telling me that He was in control of it all.  I have never been so amazed at anything in my life. 

Currently, I can't say I have any large trials facing me (well other than having to send my precious boy to kindergarten, but I am very thankful we have such a good school to send him to).  I praise God for this.  I pray that when the time comes, I will remember to 'praise Him in the storm'.